Goals? Assists? What Has Giroud Ever Done For Arsenal?
That was close! Arsenal didn’t play particularly well despite having a numerical advantage and passing the ball reasonably well in the second-half but they managed to hold out for a 1-0 win and crucially, three more points on the tally.
It wasn’t a particularly enjoyable match to watch and it was ruined by two quite unnecessary red cards. I didn’t think Sidwell’s challenge was a straight red and I certainly didn’t think Giroud’s was either but both were, according to the laws of the game, justifiable red cards so I cannot complain about the referee who I felt had a decent game.
The immediate aftermath of the game however was disgusting. The comments on twitter and general glee from some supporters at Giroud’s 3 match ban was disgraceful. He may split opinions and some may feel that he isn’t the quality we need but to actually celebrate his dismissal was frankly anti-Arsenal.
Some comments, as such comments usually are, were littered with grammatical errors and profanities describing what a waste of space Giroud is and questioning what he has brought to the team if anything at all. Immediately a Monty Python sketch popped into my head and an hour later here is a fully-formed blog. I hope you enjoy.
FRANCIS: We’re getting in through the underground system here, up through into the main champion’s league spots here, and third place is here. Having grabbed third place, we inform Spuds and Chelsea that third is in our custody and forthwith issue our demands. Any questions?
COMMANDO XERXES: What exactly are the demands?
REG: We’re giving Spuds two games in hand to dismantle the entire apparatus of the Oil Imperialist States of Mancheznia and Chelsistan, and if they can’t, we execute the chicken on St Totteringham’s day.
MATTHIAS: Cut its head off?
FRANCIS: Cut all its bits off. Send ’em back on the hour every hour. Show them we’re not to be trifled with.
REG: Also, we’re demanding a ten foot mahogany statue of the traitor Van Persie with his little boy hanging out.
LORETTA: What? They’ll never agree to that, Reg.
REG: That’s just a bar– a bargaining counter. And of course, we point out that they bear full responsibility when we chop the chicken up, and that we shall not submit to blackmail!
COMMANDOS: No blackmail!
REG: We’ll have to do it without Giroud because he got a red-card. That’s okay though because he’s shit and would have taken any chance of third we had, and not just from us, from our mates, and from our mates’ mates.
LORETTA: And from our mates’ mates’ mates.
LORETTA: And from our mates’ mates’ mates’ mates.
REG: Yeah. All right, Stan. Don’t labour the point. And what has Giroud ever given us in return?!
XERXES: The equalising penalty against Norwich?
XERXES: The penalty against Norwich.
REG: Oh. Yeah, yeah. He did give us that. Uh, that’s true. Yeah.
COMMANDO #3: And the goal to go ahead.
LORETTA: Oh, yeah, the goal, Reg. Remember what the chances of third looked like then?
REG: Yeah. All right. I’ll grant you the penalty and the goal against Norwich are two things that Giroud has done.
MATTHIAS: And the goal and assist to draw with Liverpool.
REG: Well, yeah. Obviously the Liverpool game. I mean, the Liverpool game goes without saying, doesn’t it? But apart from the Norwich penalty, the goal, and the Liverpool game–
COMMANDO: 17 goals in total in his first season.
XERXES: Link-up play. .
COMMANDOS: Huh? Heh? Huh…
COMMANDO #2: 13 Assists.
REG: Yeah, yeah. All right. Fair enough.
COMMANDO #1: And holding the ball up.
COMMANDOS: Oh, yes. Yeah…
FRANCIS: Yeah. Yeah, that’s something we’d really miss, Reg, when Giroud is out. Huh.
COMMANDO: Leading the line.
LORETTA: And it’s worth crossing the ball at times now, Reg.
FRANCIS: Yeah, he certainly knows how to get on the end of a decent cross on the rare occasions they come in. Let’s face it. He’s the only one who could in team like this.
COMMANDOS: Heh, heh. Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh.
REG: All right, but apart from the penalty, the goal, Liverpool game, 17 goals, 13 assists, leading the line, holding the ball up, link-up play and a real aerial target, what has Giroud ever done for us?
XERXES: Increased calendar sales
REG: Oh. Calendar sales? Shut up!
Here’s the original:
Clearly that’s a bit of a joke but what is an even bigger joke is that some people actually think it is okay to cheer on one of our players getting red-carded at such a crucial stage of the season.
It is utterly insane to want your team to be a player light going into the last stretch with their Champions League spot mathematically out of their hands.
What sort of clown wants to see us fail? Do people really think that by missing out on the Champions League that all of these “shit” players will leave the club? Do they think they’ll be replaced with Falcao, Hummels and Götze? If so I suggest those people stop smoking crack/popping pills/tabbing acid and throw their copies of FIFA and Football Manager in the bin because clearly their brains are addled.
Maybe they think it would be the catalyst for the board to sack the manager or maybe even themselves? Regardless of what opinions are held on Wenger by any one person or group they should realise that there is no way the board are ever going to sack him.
Giroud may not be the world-class striker that was dreamed of but 17 goals and 13 assists in 45 games in his first season in England is pretty damned good by any reasonable standard. If those standards are beneath some people I would suggest those people have ironically been spoiled by the players and style of football brought to the club by the man they most likely want to be sacked.
Giroud isn’t Van Persie and he isn’t Bergkamp or Henry but aside from the man we call King he has had a better first season in the league than the other two and better than the last great physical striker import from France, Didier Drogba, who terrorised us on a regular basis.
Olivier may never be as good as these players and may never be a 30 goal a season striker but he is a quality player and deserves a little respect for what he has achieved in his first season in the so-called best league in the world. The step up from Ligue 1 to the EPL is a big one and not everyone can make it but he looks to have done so.
Arsenal may well buy another striker in the summer and there may be some truth in claims that Giroud isn’t good enough to be the first choice striker at Arsenal to take us forward and win trophies again. However, we should be judging him in May, 2014, not January, February, March, April, May etc etc 2013.
Giroud may not be the striker some hoped for but he is the one we have and deserves a little respect and a lot of support. Come next May he may well be the hottest striker in the league and if his first season in England was just him warming up, I for one cannot wait to see what he can do next.
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